Prism Thinking – Design Your Mind

Posts tagged ‘manifesting’

Is the “Family Curse” Nothing More Than an Unhealthy Belief Pattern?

I’ve often heard folks talk about habitual events, occurrences and other strange phenomena that run within families as a “family curse”.  From infertility to financial predicaments there are those who believe they are in the state they are because it runs in the family.  There is deep rooted belief that the “sins of the father” are attributed to a kind of family karma that now plagues the descendants as generational curses.  Parents and other family members even share in great detail about why certain things within their family are the way they are, and what can be expected in the future with great vindication.  While it is apparent that events may seem a certain way, do they stem from something supernaturally inexplicable, or are they self-fulfilling prophesies? What if these were merely beliefs that were held so strongly, they were passed down to generations as inevitable truths?

Depending upon the belief or “curse”, statements such as “…money doesn’t grow on trees; our family has always struggled” and “all her husbands died untimely deaths, she must be jinxed” to “cancer or heart disease is hereditary in our family” can have strong holds and powerful effects on those being handed this legacy.  Do we really grow up believing the doom and gloom inevitability and then fulfill them? What about inspirational stories we read and hear about someone rising above and against all odds and changed the path of their supposed destiny? That is a belief too. There is actually something to be said about polarity responders who are in the habit of reversing suggestions that seem forced upon them– “Our family is destined for mediocrity??? Not ME! I’ll show THEM!

When someone puts a suggestion into the mind of a youngster, they do grow up believing it.  People stuck in a negative belief will make decisions that are desperate and fear-based.  And while the repercussions of these decisions may seem random, adopting behaviors of our role-models merely continue the pattern, thus “running it within the family”.  When a child is told with equal conviction, “you can be anything you want” they usually grow up fulfilling their dreams.  There is this lovely lady who apparently is constantly winning prizes and lotteries and she believes she is extremely lucky.  Why is this? When she was a child she was constantly told what a lucky little girl she was because her parents were Holocaust survivors. So then good fortune also runs in families as “blessings” from healthy beliefs handed down in patterns – the antithesis of the “curse’.

So then, understanding this, why live our lives around the negative and damaging beliefs? Knowing that we not only change the odds through our actions, that we also can change them through personal belief and intention, breaking a destructive pattern could be as easy as believing that some ritual performed has broken a long-time curse.  Believing that things have now changed, we begin thinking and doing things differently because we believe the outcomes can now be to our favor. Very different from, “what’s the point? It’s only going to be the same anyway!” Changing a belief from negative to positive may be a bit more challenging without certain validation, but it can be done, usually with readiness, willingness and unequivocal intent.

When we begin to look at a situation or series of events which originally happened with someone other than ourselves and realize that we are not them and that we don’t have to adopt the same patterns, mentalities and attitudes we can begin to focus on who we are and what will make us happy, and then how to go about getting there.  Having a wish list doesn’t have to be mere fantasy that we believe we can never really achieve, it could be a to-do list for our goals in bringing about our true desires when we believe we can do them. We don’t have to feel like we’re bound to someone else’s version about how their lives took shape.  Each of us is a blank canvas just waiting for us to create the life we want.

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Get Out of Your Way!

Once we set our pure intent, we plant the seeds and they are set in motion.  Sometimes, when the motion begins, and even though we cannot fully fathom the scope of the changes about to take place, life just doesn’t let you do things in the same way that you used to.  What do I mean by this?

Oftentimes when we hit a brick wall, a seeming dead-end or our lives just seem to be a scene from Groundhog Day, it’s because the patterns which we are normally comfortable in operating are providing us with the same results.  They may be different circumstances but often the outcome usually feels the same, often disappointing us with the “same old”.  Einstein defined insanity as doing the same things over and over and expecting different results.  Sometimes hidden, the comfortable patterns we go to when we set about to achieve something are being performed in the same way as we always do, cleverly masked by new and different circumstances, situations and settings.

This is not to say that a fool-proof or successful process can’t be re-applied again and again, but let’s get clear the fact that even though situations may seem new or similar on some level to us, if we keep comparing and generalizing them to our prior experiences, we run the risk of never applying a new strategy and even missing “the difference” in each experience.  To learn something new and to be first open to learning something new affords us the ability to apply a fresh facet to an existing strategy or thinking up a new approach altogether.

Now let’s go back to my previous statement. When we state a pure intention to receive, opportunities will present themselves to us.  Whether or not we’re open to noticing them, is another point. The fact is when opportunities present themselves and we begin the process of actively pursuing them, sometimes our partners in our co-creative process, be it Divine intervention, intuition, instinct or whatever you perceive is guiding you, will just not allow us to apply our same old strategies in how we go about it. It’s telling us if we’re listening, “Learn and move on from past lessons and do something different now!” Even if you haven’t noticed this before, doesn’t it just seem even vaguely familiar? It’s most commonly heard when someone says something like, “Something just lead the way,” or “It felt like something prevented me from doing that.”

Pure intent – “pure” being the key word, would make way for the clarity required in how you make the pictures of how you see what you see, hear what you hear and feel what you would feel in your own life’s fantasy movie playing out. When you have the tools to make them clear enough, you may be already setting in motion all the necessary appropriate new strategies needed to get you there.  It seems logical that doing the “same old” does not make a good match to your newfound creation process. This is also true of old patterns, or stale dynamics within our own inter-personal relationships which cause conflict and disruption to the harmony and flow needed.

Remember in these situations when you are co-creating your life and things get in the way of how you normally do things or something’s steering you in a new direction, the “universe” may just be telling you to get out of your own way so you can start living your dream!

Note: These are just a few perspectives. I have more—as should we all.

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Permission Granted, or Access Denied?

What is the secret formula for having the life you desire? A life of abundant blessings of love, joy, good health, success, peace and prosperity.  After all, I daresay that this is what most humans pray for, wish for and dream about.  Why is it that many of us just seem to be banging our heads against the wall trying desperately to achieve the things we most desire? We pray, chant mantras, having faith and believing that all things are possible to those who learn and evolve with the appropriate intention, actions and beliefs. What have we forgotten about ourselves, when we believe with all positivity, persevere with determination, and yet something deep down, a hidden negative belief, doubts, insecurity seem to rear their ugly heads and seep into our positive thought and energy?

I was thinking intently about this and I realized—free will! We forget that we humans have free-will and there’s something really powerful about acknowledging and exercising this God-given gift.  While being sensitive to different dimensional energies around us, I noticed a change in my neurology when I state my intention regarding what energies I DO NOT give permission to affect me.  I noticed that this is the thing that many do not understand when suddenly faced with the fact that there may be other energies around us that we actually interact with daily.  Many people take the victim role and fear the possibility of some other forces “doing something to them”.  Friends, we have free-will, exercise it! We let whatever negative energy we are faced with know that it does not have our permission to mess with us!

So then, what happens when we pray for things we want? Do we pray, chant, repeat and hope we will be blessed with and hopefully manifest what we want? Do we actually give permission for these things to come into our lives? Once you’ve given permission, you’ve cleared the path.  The intent and the words are important and specific, “I give you permission to show me the way and send me these blessings, God, Spirit, my angels, guides, my Higher Self, my honored family elders of blessed memory who continue to inspire…”

In the coaching work my husband Jeff and I do, when our clients make the commitment to proceed with the change-work they ask for, they are essentially doing this.  The many role models whose success strategies we observe and emulate, they have done this too.  Whether by pure intent, belief change, behavior modification, calls to action, they have given permission for this good to fill their lives and by their intent focus on their goals, they have shut out the negative.  We also often hear about giving ourselves permission.  To love, to enjoy the goodness of life’s offerings without guilt or destructive behavior that keeps us in our own way.  We have to also give the universe permission to provide for us all the opportunities and gifts it can bestow.  No control, no fear of lack, just permission. It’s one of life’s A-HA moments.

Seems easy enough doesn’t it? The formula was never really a formula. It is and always has been for us to remember our free-will, which is our responsibility to decide to what and whom we give permission to affect our lives.  Remember how the universe flows and how we are all connected in some way, and perhaps in more ways even beyond our comprehension.  What if this free-will is the most powerful and profoundly simple gift we have? We would never know how we co-create and partner with God, Creator, Spirit or whatever your spiritual beliefs, if we remain in a victim or submissive mentality.  If we believe that we are at the mercy of random forces that have power over us, then we let anything in and our lives will be a hit-or-miss play of the things we want, things we don’t and things to which we didn’t realize we had given permission.

In your own life-design, take an active step towards intent and your exercise of free-will.  Give permission to what you want and deny access to what you don’t, and then let it go, let it flow, see how it plays out. Remember when choosing, to play out your movie to the end. When you begin to pay attention and see the pattern of how things work, take it and pay it forward. Remind others to remember.